Hey there 311 fans – Happy 311 Day! In honor of 311 Day 2019, the fan spotlight would like to pay tribute to the beautiful soul of Amanda Elaine Baker. With the help of her husband Alex and a few close friends – lets take a moment to celebrate Amanda’s life and the light that she shared with the fan community.
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Amanda heard 311 on the radio but then saw them open for the band Sugar Ray and that completely hooked her. That first show for her was on 12/3/1997 in Tallahassee. Show count was somewhere in the 60’s. Alex said since they started dating 12 years ago Amanda went to every 311 Day and all the cruises. Alex said one example of how much she loved 311 was that she had just finished a 46 hour chemo pump back in September and right as she got it disconnected they drove 3 hours to Chicago from Indy to see them.
Favorite shows & events varied for Amanda because she just enjoyed being at each one she went to so much. Alex said that she was always wanting to take someone to their first 311 show and that is was an outstandingly important thing to her. “She loved being around “her people” – people who got it. Who enjoyed life & music. People who were just there to live.”
There were many favorite songs and lyrics that Amanda loved. Alex said she was always referred to as “Slinky Girl” when they first started dating. Then they danced their first dance as husband and wife to “Love Song.” Amanda’s motto was, “Stay positive and love your life,” from the song “Jupiter.” Then as she was diagnosed and fought cancer her battlecry became the song, “Strong All Along.” (311 just played this and dedicated it to Amanda on the most recent 311 Cruise.) Alex said that they often danced with their son to “Til the City’s on Fire” which is one of his favorite memories. During her final hours Alex would often play “Tranquility” and their wedding song for her. “The night before she passed we listened to 311 on Spotify for four hours and the play list ended on Love Song. In her final hours some of her closest 311 friends helped me build a Spotify playlist with some of her favorites and we listened to them until she passed. The music helped calm her a lot.”
Amanda loved arts and all sorts of music. Alex stated that he doesn’t know if she was ever presented with an artist that she didn’t like. Other band favorites included Dirty Heads, RDGLDGRN, Childish Gambino, Fall Out Boy, Panic at the Disco, and Sugar Ray. She also loved Broadway musicals such as Hamilton and Rent.
Amanda lived a life full of activity and she loved being involved in various hobbies. She loved Harry Potter fan fiction. She was a member of Phi Mu Fraternity and spent time volunteering for them. Amanda loved connecting with people and was good at helping suggest shows or music that they would like. Per Alex, “She cared about people finding happiness even if it was in unlikely places for them.”
The following are words from friends of Amanda. I left them in their true form, as I don’t believe I could have worded it any better than they did.
——— Elizabeth———
“It’s hard to find the words to explain how special Amanda Elaine Baker was. She was one of those people who you only meet a few times in a lifetime who has that intangible ability to bring out the best in everyone around her.
I became friends with Amanda at one of the lowest points in my life. I had such self loathing, I had hidden who I was from the world for a decade, only allowing people to see a fraction of the real me. When I became friends with Amanda, we had so much in common, we called ourselves “twitter BFFs.” The first time we met in person was one of the first times I ever met an online friend in real life and I was terrified. I was not used to being accepted for who I am, much less loved and celebrated for it. Amanda came to Houston to see Childish Gambino just before my first 311 day in 2014. We met at House of Blues and I was trembling as I approached the table. We adored each other online but at that point in my life I didn’t believe that anyone could ever accept and love the real me. Those fears dissolved away the moment I got to know Amanda.
See, the really special thing about Amanda was the fact that she embodied something that took me 40 years to learn. Amanda understood that the things that make us different, the things that would cause people to label us as weird, nerd, reject, freak, those little differences are the things that make each of us amazing. Being a member of many fandoms, Amanda embraced the various differences in the people around her and she loved with a love and acceptance so unconditional, you couldn’t help but catch some of that contagious love and acceptance and pass it on to yourself. To know Amanda was to know true acceptance and unconditional love. To know Amanda was to never be alone no matter what you were facing. There are numerous times of my life that I look back on and think, “I don’t know how I would have gotten through that without Amanda.” She was always there for anyone who needed her. She radiated sunshine, laughter and passion. She was a member of many different fandoms, but she was never more of a fan than she was of the friends and family around her. She was a cheerleader, an encourager, a hilarious sass master, and the most loving wife and mother I’ve ever had the honor to witness.”
———Amber & Daniel———
“The very first time we meet Amanda was on the 2nd 311 cruise. I had just started using twitter and had thrown out that my husband, Daniel and I would make a great addition to someone’s flip cup team! Ryan caught the tweet and was quick to invite us to a team made up of his wife, Timea, Amanda, and her husband Alex. We chatted endlessly about our hours of practice, our shirt designs for our team ,Team Beard Love, and how even we Ladies would be rocking fashionable beards! Finally the day came to meet in person, we gathered in the port of Miami before boarding the ship and nervously introduced ourselves in person. We ate dinner with one another, talked about anything and everything, I think before the day was over we had at least half a dozen inside jokes. Day two brought the big flip cup tournament, nerves got the better of me, I lost it for our team, but it didn’t matter at all, we had a ridiculous amount of fun!
The main thing I remember from that trip, is we had split nights for one of the shows in the theatre. Amanda, Daniel, Billy (@311Phillies), and myself all were on the pool deck watching 311 on the large screen, dancing and singing, and as “Homebrew” was being played and Amanda and I were rapping along with SA, my brain just hit a thought I will never forget… “This is friendship. It’s natural and organic in growth, it’s not forced. It’s being yourself and not putting up a front, or trying to be something you are not just to impress. It’s embracing each other weirdness and uniqueness and just loving the hell out of one another”. Amanda embodied that to her very core. She made friends with everyone, because she was so passionate about the things she loved in her life. She invested in everything, her whole heart. A great example of this, was that on later cruises, when Alex was not able to join, she’d lovingly search for souvenirs with lobsters, claiming that she bought him these cheesy things because he was her lobster. Her one true love, her heart. I admired this so much about her and Alex!
Later her and I would bond over Harry Potter, Childish Gambino, Community, and eventually we bonded over being moms. She started my sons personal library with a huge stash of her favorite books to share with Riley. We both became a part of our self made group of the Strong All Along Tattoo sisterhood. We became “pit buddies” and traveled to ATL rocking a shirt “Clean Midwest in the Dirty South”. She was just a glowing light, and will be so sorely missed. She was the epitome of Stay Positive and Love your life, it was engrained in her very being.”
———Tessa———
“I’ve never known anyone that could make friends as quickly as Amanda. When I look at the group of friends I met through 311 I really met most of them because of Amanda. We called each other our 311 Soulmates, but I’m sure other people felt that way about her too.
She was small, but never missed the opportunity to be in the pit (with zero tolerance for crowd surfers). She told the best stories, but always listened to others intently. She was sincere, but could knock you over with a viciously sarcastic comment. She was diagnosed with cancer, but kept fighting and living life with a fervor we should all hope to match.
She kept going to shows and traveling when she could. She was trying to decide what excursions to go on on the cruise just before she passed. She never gave up. Amanda was a warrior, a mother, a wife, a daughter, a sister, and a friend. She was Strong All Along.”
———Suzanne & Brett———
“Brett and I met Amanda on Twitter around 2009-2010 and were in the RV space next to her for the Pow Wow in 2011 and met several times at various shows. When we moved to the Indianapolis area in 2013, she was among the first to welcome us to the Indy Crew. We bonded not only over 311 but also over Harry Potter and occasionally had weeks where we would watch one movie per week. Amanda was a loyal and fierce friend, a true inspiration to all who knew her on how to live and love. “The ones who love us never really leave us, you can always find them in here.” – Sirius Black, Prisoner of Azkaban”
———Kim———
“I first started talking to Amanda on twitter, we bonded over our mutual love of 311 and all things nerdy. We met a few years later for the first time at none other than a 311 show, I want to say it was in Atlanta when 311 played the Tabernacle. I wandered onto the floor and i heard someone scream KIMBO! and there she was barreling towards me. Amanda was always so kind and managed to find the positive in even the most negative situations. She made me laugh, she was always there for me when I needed kind words. After my dad passed away, I found a passion for photography and she was always so supportive of my pictures. I miss her kind words so much. I remember at 311 day 2018 my husband dressed up as a cowboy and she just thought it was so funny, I’ll never forget her face we he walked up lol. She was one of a kind, that sounds so cliche but it’s the truth.”
———Tara———
“Amanda was truly a wonderful human. Positive, inspiring, loving and always full of humor and light. She defined being a wife, mother and friend.
We were very different in many ways. However, this never mattered to Amanda. Never did I feel judged. We had healthy and respectful discussions and she truly listened. I so loved and appreciated that about her.
We shared many passions in common and bonded over them often. I am thankful that my recent memories of her include experiencing these passions with each other. Seeing HP and the Cursed Child, a Dirty Heads concert where we ended up in their fan video together and also the simple things that meant so much to her – exchanging funny memes and completely rambling Marco Polos. There was still not enough time with her, but I am so grateful to have had these. I will tell you all this right now – don’t put off making memories with the people in your life. We will all miss you so very, very much, love.”
———Timea———
“My husband Ryan and I met Amanda randomly enough – she use to work at the PNC branch we frequented. One day we stopped by the bank when we were wearing 311 shirts, getting ready to go to a show somewhere nearby. She was so excited to find more local 311 friends. We would ride together to shows, dragging Alex along to a few. (I remember driving to the Louisville show with her and Alex and Ryan and Alex saw a billboard for Steak and Pancakes. The boys wanted to divert for a side trip!
Amanda introduced me to so many 311 friends – Suzanne, Rindy, Brittney. She was probably the most positive person I have ever met. She was so full of energy – I was always amazed at all the activities and functions she attended! Later after we both had kids she was a great sounding board. I knew i could ask her for real advice/opinions without judgement! I don’t have a ton more to add other than I will miss her energy and positivity so much. The world definitely lost a great person.”
———Rhi———
“Amanda and I met on Myspace back in 2005. To me, she was the O.G. slinky girl and has been one of my longest and dearest 311 friends. The only other fan I’ve known longer than her is B Love, lol. When I was going to my first 311 day back on Memphis, I knew nobody. I just knew I had a ticket to the show and that was that. She offered that o could stay with her and she’d pick me up at the airport. She talked to my dad to ensure she was a real person and wasn’t going to kidnap me. That phone call alone was probably the only reason I got to go. The second I saw her and she hugged me, we were instantly bonded and became amazing friends for life! We always met up for 311 days and we went on the 1st 311 cruise together. Even though we lived in different states, we always remained in touch, keeping our friendship going and it made all the times I did get to see her so much better! She truly was a one of a kind person and there’s a huge hole in my heart without her. She was loved by so many and was so passionate about her love for 311 and turning others onto them. All my best 311 memories include her and she knows that!”
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Alex said that he knows Amanda’s words to 311 would have simply been, “Thank you.”
Alex has these words he’d like to pass on to all the fans in the spirit of Amanda:
“Fuck the naysayers and stay positive and love your life. #StrongAllAlong. Celebrate each day and what she meant to you and the community. Amanda wanted people to be comfortable with themselves and live each day to the fullest.”
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Amanda was clearly what we should all strive to be – positive, accepting, and just a light in all of the peoples lives that she touched. Stop for a moment today and be thankful that you are here and be grateful for all that you have in your life. Do something today that would have made Amanda proud. Celebrate 311 Day to honor her life, whether you knew her or not. Sending much love to all of Amanda’s family and friends, and to all of the fan community. Remember to love one another…stay positive…and love your life.
Much Love – The Runt